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| Vital Tyke | "I was watching the Blackburn game on TV on Sunday when it flashed on the screen that George (Ndah) had scored in the first minute at Birmingham. My first reaction was to ring him up. Then I remembered he was out there playing." - Ade Akinbiyi | | |
| Vital Tyke | "If my footballers were builders the house they built would fall down." - Alan Ball | | |
| Vital Tyke | "Liverpool back to eleven men and it's ten men apiece." - Alan McInally | | |
| Vital Tyke | "And Ritchie has now scored eleven goals, exactly double the number he scored last season." - Alan Parry | | |
| Vital Tyke | "One accusation you can't throw at me is that I've always done my best." - Alan Shearer | | |
| Vital Tyke | "He quickly latched on to an Emile Heskey nonce." - Alan Smith | | |
| Vital Tyke | "All footballers who take recreational drugs should be hammered." - Andy Gray | | |
| Vital Tyke | "For my money, Duff servicing people from the left with his balls in there is the best option." - Andy Gray | | |
| Vital Tyke | "If Graeme Souness was a chocolate drop, he'd eat himself." - Archie Gemmill | | |
| Vital Tyke | "Tony Blair was on Football Focus the other week and named me as one of his favourite players. My father-in-law phoned me and said 'I've never heard such rubbish!' - but I think it's great. I voted Lib-Dem last time but I'm Labour again now." - Arjan De Zeeuw | | |
| Vital Tyke | "We didn't think he would play on Sunday because he was suspended - that makes me think he has all the qualities to join Arsenal" - Arsene Wenger [on signing Jose Reyes] | | |
| Vital Tyke | "The Dutch look like a huge jar of marmalade." - Barry Davies | | |
| Vital Tyke | "I always used to put my right boot on first, and then obviously my right sock." - Barry Venison | | |
| Vital Tyke | "The Croatians don't play well without the ball." - Barry Venison | | |
| Vital Tyke | "Like so many of the current Chelsea team, Zola is unique." - Barry Venison | | |
| Vital Tyke | "Paul Scholes - the most complete mental player I've ever seen." - Ben Thornley | | |
| Vital Tyke | "I prefer players not to be too good or clever at other things. It means they concentrate on football." - Bill Nicholson | | |
| Vital Tyke | "Some people think football is a matter of life and death... I can assure them it is much more serious than that." - Bill Shankly | | |
| Vital Tyke | "We murdered them 0-0." - Bill Shankly | | |
| Vital Tyke | "If you're in the penalty area and aren't sure what to do with the ball, just stick it in the net and we'll discuss your options afterwards." - Bill Shankly | | |
| Vital Tyke | "Diego Maradona - a flawed genius who has now become a genius who is flawed." - Bob Wilson | | |
| Vital Tyke | "I don't agree that there's an over-abundance of a lack of quality." - Brad Friedel | | |
| Vital Tyke | "If God wanted us to play football in the air then he would have built a pitch in the clouds." - Brian Clough | | |
| Vital Tyke | "If I had an argument with a player we would sit down for twenty minutes, talk about it and then decide I was right." - Brian Clough | | |
| Vital Tyke | "Mark Hughes - Sparky by name, Sparky by nature. The same can be said of Brian McClair." - Brian Moore | | |
| Vital Tyke | "After a goalless first half, the score at half time is 0-0." - Brian Moore | | |
| Vital Tyke | "Dennis Wise, Vinnie Jones and John Fashanu must be turning in their graves." - Carlton Palmer | | |
| Vital Tyke | "Can you believe it? James Beattie's hit it on the 18 yard line - 22 yards out." - Chris Kamara | | |
| Vital Tyke | "He had it on a plate. He had the sausage, bacon and eggs on it as well, but he couldn't take it." - Chris Kamara | | |
| Vital Tyke | "I told the players we need to win so that I can have the cash to buy some new ones." - Chris Turner | | |
| Vital Tyke | "It was not me making those saves, it was God." - Claudio Taffarel | | |
| Vital Tyke | "That was a needle through the haystack job." - Clive Allen | | |
| Vital Tyke | "He's not George Best, but then again no-one is." - Clive Tyldesley | | |
| Vital Tyke | "Michael Owen - he's got the legs of a salmon." - Craig Brown | | |
| Vital Tyke | "We are now entering a new millenium and football's a completely different cup of tea." - Dave Bassett | | |
| Vital Tyke | "I honestly believe that we can go all the way to Wembley... unless somebody knocks us out." - Dave Bassett | | |
| Vital Tyke | "My parents have been there for me, ever since I was about seven." - David Beckham | | |
| Vital Tyke | "We're definitely going to get Brooklyn christened, but we don't know into which religion." - David Beckham | | |
| Vital Tyke | "I'm glad to say that this is the first Saturday in four weeks that sport will be weather-free." - David Coleman | | |
| Vital Tyke | "People think you must be crackers if you've got a psychologist but psychology is part of the building bricks to make a top athlete." - David James | | |
| Vital Tyke | "If he is the answer it's a bloody stupid question." David Mellor [on Peter Crouch] | | |
| Vital Tyke | "The sight is in end." - David Pleat | | |
| Vital Tyke | "I think they'll have to throw the kitchen sink at them now a bit. Maybe not the whole sink with all the plumbing - maybe just the taps for now." - David Pleat | | |
| Vital Tyke | "Bordeaux's champagne country, isn't it?" - David Pleat | | |
| Vital Tyke | "I am trying to make love to the wife more slowly - I'm enjoying that bit." - Dean Sturridge | | |
| Vital Tyke | "He's one of those footballers whose brains are in his head." - Derek Johnstone | | |
| Vital Tyke | "More football later, but first let's see the goals from the Scottish cup final." - Des Lynam | | |
| Vital Tyke | "Chesterfield 1 - Chester 1. Another score draw in that local derby." - Des Lynam | | |
| Vital Tyke | "The Saudis would struggle in Europe because of that problem with those prayers five times a day." - Don Howe | | |
| Vital Tyke | "Women are ultimately all that matters in life. Everything that we do is for them." - Emmanuel Petit | | |
| Vital Tyke | "I love England, one reason being the magnificent breasts of English girls." - Emmanuel Petit | | |
| Vital Tyke | "There are no bungs in football, only presents." - Eric Hall | | |
| Vital Tyke | "We have a game every three days. How can I be a good husband if I don't make love before each one?" - Frank Leboeuf | | |
| Vital Tyke | "We just went out and played the same stale cheese." - Franz Beckenbauer | | |
| Vital Tyke | "I don't really like the north. It's always raining, it's really cold and I don't like all those little houses." Freddie Kanoute | | |
| Vital Tyke | "I moisturise daily with Nivea and I regularly use Nivea body lotion." - Freddie Ljungberg | | |
| Vital Tyke | "Alan Shearer is boring - we call him Mary Poppins." - Freddy Shepherd | | |
| Vital Tyke | "Newcastle girls are all dogs. England is full of them." - Freddy Shepherd | | |
| Vital Tyke | "You should only say good things when somebody leaves. Robert has gone - good!" - Freddy Shepherd | | |
| Vital Tyke | "The World Cup is every four years so it's going to be a perennial problem." - Gary Lineker | | |
| Vital Tyke | "If somebody in the crowd spits at you, you've got to swallow it." - Gary Lineker | | |
| Vital Tyke | "There's no in between - you're either good or bad. We were in between." - Gary Lineker | | |
| Vital Tyke | "Manchester United are breathing down the heels of Liverpool now." - Gary Newbon | | |
| Vital Tyke | "As I was heading towards goal, Alan Ball was shouting 'Hursty, Hursty, give me the ball!'. I said to myself 'sod you Bally, I'm on a hat-trick'." - Geoff Hurst | | |
| Vital Tyke | "I spent 90% of my money on women and drink. The rest I wasted." - George Best | | |
| Vital Tyke | "I've stopped drinking, but only while I'm asleep." - George Best | | |
| Vital Tyke | "In 1969 I gave up women and alcohol - it was the worst 20 minutes of my life." - George Best | | |
| Vital Tyke | "What I said to them at half time would be unprintable on radio." - Gerry Francis | | |
| Vital Tyke | "You must be strong in March, when the fish are down." - Gianluca Vialli | | |
| Vital Tyke | "75% of what happens to Paul Gascoigne in his life is fiction." - Glen Hoddle | | |
| Vital Tyke | "His tackle was definitely pre-ordained." - Glen Hoddle | | |
| Vital Tyke | "At this moment in time I did not say them things." - Glen Hoddle | | |
| Vital Tyke | "The world looks a totally different place after two wins. I can even enjoy watching Blind Date or laugh at Noel's House Party." - Gordon Strachan | | |
| Vital Tyke | "The opening ceremony was good, although I missed it." - Graeme Le Saux | | |
| Vital Tyke | "Samassi Abou don't speak the English too good." - Harry Redknapp | | |
| Vital Tyke | "I'm a firm believer that if you score one goal the other team have to score two to win." - Howard Wilkinson | | |
| Vital Tyke | "I'm in Miracle on 34th Street. If you've seen the film, that's me. I believe in Father Christmas." - Iain Dowie | | |
| Vital Tyke | "It's a St Valentine's Day box of chocolates, one that I am going to enjoy and I hope that when I unwrap it it has got a soft centre." - Iain Dowie | | |
| Vital Tyke | "I mean no respect to Donatella. I'm sure she would not be flattered to hear she looks like Marc Bircham." - Ian Holloway | | |
| Vital Tyke | "There was a spell in the second half when I took my heart off my sleeve and put it in my mouth." - Ian Holloway | | |
| Vital Tyke | "Right now everything is going wrong for me - if I fell in a barrel of boobs, I'd come out sucking my thumb!" - Ian Holloway | | |
| Vital Tyke | "To the people who booed - boo to you!" - Ian Holloway | | |
| Vital Tyke | "We actually got the winner three minutes from the end but then they equalised." - Ian McNail | | |
| Vital Tyke | "Moving from Wales to Italy is like moving to a different country." - Ian Rush | | |
| Vital Tyke | "I wouldn't be surprised if this game went all the way to the finish." - Ian St John | | |
| Vital Tyke | "It took a lot of bottle for Tony (Adams) to own up." - Ian Wright | | |
| Vital Tyke | "You've got to take the rough with the smooth. It's like love and hate, war and peace, all that bollocks." - Ian Wright | | |
| Vital Tyke | "If Kevin Keegan fell into the Tyne, he'd come up with a salmon in his mouth." - Jack Charlton | | |
| Vital Tyke | "As a manager, Alf Ramsey is like a good chicken farmer. If a hen doesn't lay, a good chicken farmer wrings its neck." - Jackie Milburn | | |
| Vital Tyke | "Juninho will only need to learn three words of English: Pound, thank you and bye bye." - Jan Aage Fjortoft | | |
| Vital Tyke | "I came to England with £900. I learned to like beans on toast pretty quickly." - Jay DeMerit | | |
| Vital Tyke | "When Cookie sold you a dummy, you had to pay to get back in the ground." - Jim Baxter | | |
| Vital Tyke | "They'll be dancing in the streets of Total Network Solutions tonight." - Jeff Stelling | | |
| Vital Tyke | "We signed to play until the day we died, and we did." - Jimmy Greaves | | |
| Vital Tyke | "The thing about sport, any sport, is that swearing is very much part of it." - Jimmy Greaves | | |
| Vital Tyke | "Manchester United are looking to Frank Stapleton to pull some magic out of the fire." - Jimmy Hill | | |
| Vital Tyke | "I am no longer a footballer. I am an industry." - Johann Cruyff | | |
| Vital Tyke | "The World Cup is a truly international event." - John Motson | | |
| Vital Tyke | "For those of you watching in black and white, Spurs are in the all yellow strip." - John Motson | | |
| Vital Tyke | "This is a once in a lifetime opportunity for these players. Well, twice in a lifetime if you count the first match." - John Motson | | |
| Vital Tyke | "Nearly all the Brazilian supporters are wearing yellow shirts. It's a fabulous kaleidoscope of colour." - John Motson | | |
| Vital Tyke | "Winning all the time is not necessarily good for the team." - John Toshack | | |
| Vital Tyke | "Leeds is a great club and it's been my home for years, even though I live in Middlesbrough." - Jonathan Woodgate | | |
